Whether you’ve been to one festival this summer or are making your way through them all, you’re pretty much guaranteed to see the exact same kinds of people on every muddy site.
From 6am ravers to that one person absolutely covered in mud, these are the 19 types of folk you’ll spot. Think of it as Irish festival bingo…
1. The Hugger
We geddit, you’re a lover man, not a hater. Just please, don’t touch us.
2. The Crusty Fella
They refuse to use the on-site showers, won’t accept any offers of Baby Wipes, and have been wearing the same tshirt since the bus down. Yuck.
3. The Annoyingly Tall Person
We. Can’t. Fucking. See. Anything. Move to back you giant.
4. The Wannabe-Blogger
“Heyyyyy guyyys, so this is the main stage, omg HOW CUTE”
5. The Foodie
All they care about is the food-stalls and guest speakers on topics such as passive veganism and creating the perfect spice mix.
6. The Exhibitionist
No matter what the weather is, they just DO NOT wanna wear clothes.
7. The Fancy Dress Lover
Normal clothes just won’t do. Onesies, morph suits, and borderline inappropriate Native American headdresses are these peeps style game.
8. The Fashionista
They change outfits in between every act, and look like Kendall Jenner’s twin.
9. The Person Who Went Too Hard Too Early
They pre-drank WAY too heavy, KO’d in the tent and now they’ve missed the entire first night of the festival. Oops.
10. The #GlamSquad
How do these gals look so groomed after three days in a mucky tent?!
11. The Freaky Dancer
There’s not even any music playing. It’s 6am. They’re STILL dancing.
12. The Clinger
They say they’ve “lost” their mates. We reckon they have none. Either way, this person wants to be your new BFF and will be clinging by your side the entire time.
13. The Instagram Addict
They spend four hours trying to take the perfect Boomerang, and won’t go into the dance tent because “the lighting isn’t good in there.”
14. The Try-hard Parent
We get it, you wanna enjoy yourself. But kids at festivals after 6pm just doesn’t work. Too loud, too many people, and waaay too wild.
15. The Old-Skool Raver
“It’s just like Glasto ’89 guyyyyys”. Except it’s not. We admire their stamina.
16. The Person Covered In Mud
Does anyone actually like getting this filthy?!
17. The Pro-Camper
Air mattress, portable phone charger, and enough rice cakes for a small army.
18. The Amateur-Camper
Their tent collapses on the first night and now they’re sleeping in a pool of water with a sheet of cardboard covering them.
19. The Young Lovers
Soooooooo much PDA. Get a room guys. Or y’know, go back to the tent.
Which one are you?
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