Christmas is a time of couple selfies plastered all over social media at the Christmas Markets; of hand holding walking through the park and squeals of joy when ‘Bae did well’ after getting that necklace you’ve been not so subtly dropping hints about all winter.
But have you ever noticed that come January, it seems like a LOT of your friends are suddenly single.
According to Carlen Costa, PhD, a therapist and sexologist who talked to Refinery 29 about the breakup coincidence, there’s some very logical reasons why a heap of couples call it quits once the bell tolls on December 31.
“This time of year evokes such an emotional response in people, that they sometimes want to hide from the negative things going on in their lives and focus on the happy stuff,” says Dr. Carlen.
“Instead of facing reality, it’s easier to just go into Christmas dreamland and pretend everything is okay.”
People are also exposed to family pressures over Christmas and this puts a big strain on relationships
Amie Harwick, PhD, a marriage and family therapist says: “You may have family asking you when you’re planning on getting married, which may make you question whether or not that’s actually something you want from this specific partnership.”
And if your relationship is already on the rocks, a lot of people hang in just because it’s Christmas.
If there’s issues in your relationship or problems you’ve meaning to chat through, quite often people just swallow their feelings and wait out the festive season to bring it up so as not to cause upset. This isn’t a great idea though, as everything then builds and builds.
“People put their lives on hold during this time of year, just to get through it,” Dr. Carlen says. “But that means that you’re not moving forward in a positive way. Your life can’t just stop because it’s Christmas.”
The experts’ advice? Don’t wait for the “right time” to break up
“It’s better to rip the Band-Aid off,” Dr. Carlen says. “It will be better for you both in the long run.”
Christ. Does this mean we don’t have to go gift shopping after all?
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