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08th Mar 2018

15 Things That Used To Put The Fear of God Into You As A Child

clodagh

Ah, childhood. The good old days.

Where you had no responsibilites or the crushing realisation that you’ll probably never be a home-owner.

Those were the days – although they weren’t without their faults.

It has to be said that we were innocent and naive little creatures when we were younger.

The very slightest thing putting the fear of God into us, with these ones in particular still haunting us to this day:

1. “I’m going to count to three…”

You never really found out what came after three, because you were too damn afraid.

2. The black bin bag

Your mother’s favourite threat when you didn’t tidy your room: the black bin bag would come along for all your favourite toys unless you tidied up.

3. The threat of turning the car around

You knew your parents meant business when they threatened to turn around and go back home.

Scary business.

4. Believing chewing gum would stay in your stomach for seven years

You didn’t even mean to swallow it, it was an accident!

5. Getting the MMR injection at school

You would have nightmares about it for a full week beforehand.

6. The wooden spoon

Enough said.

7. Going to Confession at Mass

Mainly because you didn’t want to tell the Priest that it had been three years since you last went.

8. “I’ll leave you there if you don’t behave”

The one line that would always stop a tantrum in its tracks.

9. Being at the till when your Mam went to get one more thing

You have to stand there awkwardly and seriously hope that she gets back before the last item is scanned.

10. Movies your older siblings forced you to watch

You wanted to impress them and thought you could handle it but … you really couldn’t.

11. Sleeping with your hand down the side of the bed.

Why would you do that to yourself? Why?

12. “There will be no treats for you on Friday”

Quite possibly one of the worst punishments. You lived for your weekly treat.

13. Smoking

And all because of this ad.

14. Swearing

The first time you heard a swear word in real life you were shocked.

And look at you now, you little f*cker. The mouth on ya.

15. When people would say Santa isn’t real

You knew it wasn’t real. It couldn’t be, yet…

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