Leo Varadkar’s “very bold” wing night – analysed

Where are the sides? Why are the drinks positioned at the opposite end of the table? How is that minuscule serving of dip ever going to be enough for two people?

At this stage of proceedings, we have no choice but to assume the Tánaiste is trolling us with his culinary sharings – the sneak peek at his grim meal prep, the now infamous battenburg – each and every table snap contributes to a larger tapestry of austerity and woe. Not to be dramatic or anything.

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Last night, in what we’re hoping for everyone’s sake was some sort of wing-related wise crack, Leo Varadkar shared yet another overwhelmingly bleak table spread. The wings sit sadly in their takeaway container as Leo and Matt smile for the camera, wearing pristine white tops without a kitchen roll bib between them. There’s not enough Vanish in Ireland to deal with the potential carnage.

Also on display are a lovely set of placemats and coasters by all accounts, but the two thimble-sized servings of wine sit on the opposite end, raw-dogging the walnut oak table without a care in the world for water rings. Absolutely lawless.

Meanwhile, the question on everyone’s lips – where are the sides? Would you not have laid out a chunky wedge or spoonful of mac and cheese, even for aesthetic purposes alone? Wings are great and all, but we need more. The country needs more. Every Irish citizen needs more.

We await with bated breath the next instalment in this series of sad table spreads.

Header image via Instagram/Leo Varadkar

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