The countdown is on.
The vast Irish diaspora will be packing their suitcases shortly for the trip home to the Emerald Isle for their Christmas holidays. They’ll be coming from England, from Scotland, from America, Australia, every country in the world basically.
Typical really, we can’t wait to get out of the country but it always keeps calling us back.
Many of us would find it difficult to imagine not being “home” for the festive season.
Here’s why…
1) Your family picking you up at the airport
If you’re lucky!
2) Meeting your mates for a pint
And they spend more time insulting you than welcoming you home.
3) That pint being a beautifully creamy Guinness
“Guinness doesn’t travel well.”
4) Eating loads of Quality Street and Roses
Everything, apart from the green triangles.
5) Rashers
Bacon is readily available throughout the world, but never tastes as good as it is at home.
6) The annual Christmas family argument
We wouldn’t be siblings if we weren’t tearing the head off each other.
7) Christmas Mass
It’s the Super Bowl of the church year.
8) The excitement on your brother’s/sister’s/nephew/niece’s face when they’re opening presents
It’s a time for the family, but realistically it’s more about the presents.
9) Turkey
Why don’t we eat this beautiful bird more often?
10) Christmas jumpers
The uglier the better.
11) Gravy
We’re going to bathe in that shit.
12) Sitting around the fire
Those who now live in warmer climates automatically gravitate towards the only heat coming from the house.
13) Hot whiskeys
While we’re on the topic of keeping warm.
14) Boxing/Stephen’s Day dinner
It’s better than the big day, let’s just acknowledge that.
15) The unreal films on the telly
There’s Home Alones and Harry Potters flying all around the place.
16) Mammy doing the washing for a week or two
Praise the sweet lord.
17) NOT New Year’s Eve
Sit in your house all night and lock the door, for this is the most overrated shite night out you will have all year.
18) Drinking 13 cups of tea a day
Ah well sure, if you’re having one yourself
19) Having a peek at the presents on Christmas Eve
We will never grow up.
20) Just this whole big beautiful island
There’s no place like home.