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10 Telltale Signs Your Other Half Is Suffering From A Serious Dose Of Notions

By seank

May 3, 2019 at 11:20am


Have you been noticing... signs in your other half?

I'm talking about clues that they may not be all that they seem, hints that maybe, just maybe, the person you love most in this world may be suffering from the sickness known as notions.

It'd break their poor mother's heart to learn of it, 'twas far from pink Champagne they were reared, but sometimes it just can't be denied.

Do you have the sneaking suspicion that your other half is riddled with notions? Well then, consider us a WebMD for pretentiousness, cos we're about to tell you symptoms to look out for...

1. They do big shops in M&S

This cannot be considered normal human behaviour.

Burning Money

2. They hire a cleaner for their apartment

Heaven forbid they have to deal with their own filth.

Cleaning Gif

3. They show ZERO respect to waiting staff

Leaving you both red-faced and terrified of that inevitable spit-speckled main.

Silence Slave

4. If a crisp isn't gourmet, they don't want anything to do with it

The tragedy being they'll never know the simple pleasure of a Tayto sambo.

5. They do Bikrim Yoga

If your partner likes to spend €50 to contort themselves in a highly humid 40°C room in their underwear while surrounded by strangers, maybe it's time to reevaluate your relationship.

Cat Yoga

6. They've become too good for Penneys


7. They insist on spectacular holiday destinations purely for social media material

Putting you on Instagram spouse duties.

Instagram Husband

8. You "embarrass" them by asking for ketchup in a classy restaurant

Your constant search for tomato-y deliciousness offends their delicate sensibilities.

Ketchup Fancy Sauce

9. They're always on a fad diet

Meaning they'll always just want a "taste" of your actually tasty dinner.

Joey Sharing Food

10. They baulk at the very idea of the Eurosaver menu

Placing you in the unenviable position of being caught between the love of your life and your love of value.


If you're other half meets most of this criteria, we're afraid the diagnosis is not good — and we prescribe a hefty dose of copping the feck on.

READ NEXT: Apparently This Is The One Thing That Makes A Man Absolutely Irresistible


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